After the drought comes the rain

GEMINI: I hate to tell you this bestie, but both of your sugar daddies met at the same conference last Friday. Either drop one or tell them you’re not actually exclusive. Sugar daddies have feelings too.

In 2016 racist comments by the University’s namesake were unearthed. Lecturers and students called for a discussion around a name change. Massey promised the matter would be raised formally. This never happened.

A boxer in the ring must both protect his face and strike his enemy - our policy makers need to find the same balance.

Well this is rubbish news

I waited, shirtless, for him to keep progressing down to my dick. But, instead, he lingered around my stomach. He just kept kissing it.

Tempted to enrol next year just for the free buses

Sobriety. What a concept! Sounds like a lifestyle reserved for recovering addicts and those unbearably happy people who say shit like “Why do you need drugs? Isn’t life just one great trip already?”

“It is accessible and doesn’t make us feel hidden or undervalued by the university.”

What I want to talk about is a short history of getting drunk, shown in a range of time periods and locations around the world, to compare different traditions and viewpoints with our drinking culture in modern day NZ.

Cancer: Watch out for BYOS and those coins. Your mates are getting craftier. Time to level up, bitch.

Massive decided to ask the big question: which one of these gremlins are my soulmate? Who am I going to grow old with? Have wrinkly, old person sex with? Only one way to find out.

Okay, this just officially got messy. Someone call for clean-up on Aisle 6!

As one plan falters, another one rises up in its place

In honour of the alcohol issue, Massive decided to create an exclusive Massey-themed cocktail.

I was having a bad week, okay, so I was cry-masturbating pretty much all the time. Like honestly, just all the time.

Massey’s first student-run sign language club has started at the Manawatū campus this semester.

MAWSA and student-run Facebook group ‘Disability at Massey (support and resources)’ are working hard to establish a Disabled Student’s Association.