Thank fuck for gay clubs
The Bombay Bombshell photo by Aden Meser
Going to town for a night of absolute mischief followed by insane regret is a vital part of everyone’s student experience. Frolicking down Courtney Place, or K Road or, whateverthefuck Palmy town is called. Trying to convince bouncers that you’ve only had a couple, and your pupils are just always this big. Buying overpriced drinks, or even better getting them bought for you. Most queer people know that clubbing is not the most inclusive environment. If you’re out and proud then walking into your standard club can be a moment of pure anxiety. Gay bars offer a space where we can be nothing but ourselves, even if the drinks are still pretty overpriced.
Situated at the ass-end of Cuba street, Ivy Bar offers a place for queer people and their straight friends to dance the night away to songs they actually know, with like-minded people. For women especially, Ivy is the place to go when you want to have a night out without having a sweaty, half-erect penis grind on you to the beat of terrible drum and bass music. It’s hot as fuck and there’s no cell service but going there for the first time can be kind of transformative. As a baby gay walking to Ivy for the first time you’re filled with excitement at the prospect of spending time with people just like you.
The first great thing about Ivy is that they play great fucking music. Like real nostalgic shit, and people actually sing along instead of just awkwardly bobbing to the music. I would much rather spend a night screaming the RuPaul’s Drag Race theme song than listening to the fucking Chainsmokers or something. Georgia*is a fourth-year Otago student but always makes a point to visit Ivy on her trips back home to Wellington. “The music is a highlight for me, just queer icons playing the absolute bops.”
Ivy doesn’t carry the same threatening aura as other clubs. As a woman, you’re way less likely to be approached by a creepy dude. Becca, a fourth-year design student, feels safer in Ivy. “I know that no one is going to walk behind me and grab my waist, and if something did escalate, I get the sense that there’s no ‘Boy’s Club’ in Ivy’s management that’s going to protect asshole dudes.”
Becca actually makes a good point. At the risk of sounding too trendy, Ivy is woke as shit. Their website makes it really clear that they won’t tolerate any out-of-pocket behaviour. They stress the importance of getting consent and drinking responsibly. Whether or not this is as strictly enforced as it should be is unclear, but at least they’re publicly taking a stance.
People can come to Ivy when they don’t feel safe in male dominated or ‘straight’ clubs. One student told Massive that Ivy is the only club they go to now. “I used to go to the standard clubs on Courtney Place. Because I’m not straight passing, I was always on high alert expecting trouble, which is no way to spend a night out. Ivy means I can dance and have fun with my friends without fear of a guy in a polo shirt calling me a slur.”
Walking into a club and seeing so many people just be unapologetically queer is something really special. There’s always the odd straight guy who’s been dragged there by his girlfriend, but even he’ll look oddly at peace. It’s not just students who benefit from the inclusivity of a place like Ivy. It’s been an institution for queer people of all ages. Kim is thirty-one now and used to regularly ditch her straight friends to go party at Ivy. “My first time there was when it was on Courtney Place, it had three stories and a smoker's deck, fuck I’m old.” You can still find her in there every now and then dancing the night away. Ivy, it’s timeless.
The general consensus is that drinking at Ivy is generally a more wholesome vibe. “There’s a feeling of safety and support there, it’s a good spot to explore your sexuality and have fun with your friends.”
Ivy’s position as a place for every kind of queer person is an essential part of Wellington’s queer culture. A spot where you feel comfortable to be who you are, regardless of who that is, is so important. Not only for queer people, but for anyone who feels uncomfortable or out of place in the typical ‘town’ experience.
Essentially, everyone should be able to get fucked up without feeling unsafe. There are definitely enough overpriced drinks to go around.
For Aucklanders, consider checking out The Eagle, G.A.Y, Caluzzi Cabaret, amongst so many others. In Palmy, rest in peace Club Q, we’ll miss you. Whenever you are, dear reader, make sure to check out your local LGBTQ+ bars, and if there’s not one, well, consider starting one. Be the change you want to see.