Why are men obsessed with their penis size?
Photography by Amelia Radley
Women might be more interested in a man’s personality than the size of his manhood, but it’s the men who can’t seem to get over the fact that bigger is not necessarily better.
Based on a 60-year-old research review, researchers state that men are more obsessed with the size of their penis than women. In fact, so deep runs this obsession, that it can have men breaking out into a cold sweat even if they are average size.
So what makes men (I would say boys as an ode to most men's maturity level, but it may not be appropriate when talking about penis) so obsessed with the size of their shaft, the dimensions of the dick, the proportions of their penis? I’ve uncovered a foolproof list of six hard-cold reasons we ridicule our prize jewels.
Disclaimer: I wanted to speak with a urologist (dick doctor) about the psychology behind this, but it turns out my request was a tad unprofessional x
#1 Men are barbaric.
Penis size can easily be tied to a man’s confidence. In a lion’s pride, there is only one male. The strongest lion, in fact, is the one who gets all the ladies. Every man wants to be the alpha male, and one of the easiest ways in his mind to accomplish this is by having a powerful and mighty penis, larger than any you’ve ever seen before or will again. The penis is a source of power and shame. Hotshot financial traders are known as “big swinging dicks” and the assertion of male domination is often couched in phallic terms: who’s got the biggest dick? Who’s going to slap it out on the table? The measuring never really stops and is a part of the anxiety. Am I big enough? What is big enough?
Some may say this is a tad barbaric. And it absolutely is. You see, men are simple beings, so let's speak in a simple language to get this point across. Man want to be the best sex you ever have.
#2 Societal pressures.
Yes, hold your gasps. Our lives are soooooooo hard and we face so many societal pressures….. I don’t want to diminish the pressures women face on a regular day-to-day basis, but our fragile egos get smashed whenever we see a bit of body-bashing in the media. You can guarantee that whether you’re male or female, you’ve probably received spam junk e-mails before, claiming they can make a small pecker ten times bigger with just one pill! Scams abound the internet with magical cures for the small to the average-sized penis.
E-mails aside, even porn websites target us, insecure males, promising major below-the-belt enhancements with a simple *and terrifying* penis pump, pill, exercise, or practice. While big dicks aren’t hitting mainstream media the way women’s so-called “perfect bodies” are, the pressure is definitely out there.
#3 Lads lads lads
Straight men love acting gay. It’s a weird development and quite a problematic trend in retrospect, but that's another story. It’s not uncommon to show off your cock to your friends, you know, a good ol’ compare and contrast. But whenever there is a room full of dick, someone is always pulling the short straw.
In a society of toxic masculinity, penis anxiety often stems from the pressures put on us by our very own friends. The boys, the breathers, love to talk about all things cock. If you’re found out to have a small dick, you betcha you’ll have a catchy nickname in no time. While on a surface level, everyone knows this is banter, just a bit of chat, the less endowed brothers will most likely be feeling the pinch :(
#4 Porn.
It’s likely that you grew up watching porn, and what does porn like to show off? Perfect bodies: large boobs, shaven genitals, bleached butts, and giant penises. It’s natural that we’re left to feel a little self-conscious about what's going on downstairs when the porn industry has shown us that a giant penis is what’s going to make a woman scream with pleasure.
#5 Horsecock
Men frequently worry about what women are going to think of their penises. Just as women are taught that all men like giant boobs, men are under the assumption through jokes and every Megan Thee Stallion song, that what women really want is the horsecock: 8″ and up, and don’t slack on the girth!
While it’s true that women who experience vaginal orgasms with no clit action required do tend to prefer larger penises, the vast, vast majority of women couldn’t be bothered one way or the other about it. In fact, many prefer an average-sized penis, as it still makes for mind-blowing orgasms and much less intimidating sex! You got this kings!
#6 Jealousy.
Ladies, have you ever had a boyfriend who constantly asked about your ex’s penis performance? It’s no secret that if your man is asking about your ex’s sexual performance or the down and dirty details about his down yonder, these questions are likely stemming from personal insecurities.
This is only natural. You see, men can’t exactly fake what they have hiding down below, causing this to be a major source of frustration if they find out your ex was well-endowed. Of course, he’s not going to want to think that any dick was better than his, or that you were better pleased by different size.
To round this dick-talk up. I want to pour one out for all of the men out there who have subconscious thoughts about their penis. Don’t let society shame you for what you were born with. Your dick is a part of you that you may love or hate, but remember to treat it with respect, wash it a few times and don’t be afraid to give them some time in the sun.