Ramming w/ Fergus: Step bro

Q. My mum has been talking to my crush's dad, I think we might have a step bro situation. What do I do? 

A. I know I never talk to you guys about my parents. And it's for good reason. But I’ll be open with you for the sake of helping a friend.  

When I was a ram teenager, I had a huge crush on this hot mare in the paddock across the road. We loved to flirt with each other. She would neigh at me, and I would snort at her. 

My ram dad wasn’t around much, as he had a lot of sheep mums to tend to. So, when I was a teenager, my mum started fooling around with the stallion in the paddock across the road. I had no idea. Until one day when I went over to the fence side for my daily flirt with the mare, my mum was already there baaing at the stallion. I could see my crush trying to hide behind an old barrel. I could see the red-hot shame through her shiny coat.  

I felt angry. Very angry. I wanted to piss in my mother's hay. But then I looked into her eyes, and I could see how happy she was. I turned the other way and could see my dad ramming someone in the distance. And in that moment, I decided my mum needed that romance more than me.  

And if I can do it, so can you. I have to put my hoof down on this one. The chance, even just the possibility, of dating a step sibling is fucking rank. Almost as rank as eating piss-covered hay.  

Your mum is older and wiser. If she wants to date your crushes dad, she should. You on the other hand are young and hot – you have so many options! Pick a new crush.