The Rise of the Vibrator
Okay folks, I’m gonna say it on behalf of everyone: THANK FUCK FOR VIBRATORS. As a loyal vibrator user, using one has changed my life, and I mean that with absolute seriousness. Part of it is because it’s the facilitator for my orgasms (enough said). But it truly means so much more than that, for myself and for many others.
Male pleasure has always been deemed as superior, with Hallie Lieberman discussing in her book ‘Buzz: The Stimulating History of the Sex Toy’ that the erection-inducing drug Viagra is actually covered under American health insurance. The reason behind this is because “erections are considered medically necessary for normal sexual functioning, but orgasms are not”. This is just one example out of thousands showing male pleasure overriding female pleasure. There’s also the whole issue of the orgasm gap; a collection of multiple studies done to highlight the huge gap between the number of orgasms a woman has compared to a man in a heterosexual relationship.
Sex toys have become more mainstream than ever in the last few years, ESPECIALLY vibrators. The Satisfyer Pro, in particular, turned into a raging trend on the internet, with me and my close girl friends purchasing ours at the same time because of how much we’d seen and heard about them. We simply had to know what all the craze was about and, in my experience, it LIVED UP to the hype. However, the rise of the vibrator within modern society means more than vaginas being sexually satisfied. This movement has finally put female pleasure at the forefront, rather than allowing it to continue as a ‘taboo’ subject.
After Massive interviewed a range of vibrator users, it was clear to see that the rise of the vibrator within society has resulted in extremely positive results for young ladies within New Zealand. When discussing what prompted them to buy a vibrator, Eden discussed how masturbation had always been tapu in her household and community, but seeing as her “sex drive is a bit ridiculous”, she “took matters into my own hands”. Luckily for Eden, who was at Otago Uni at the time, there was a code going around the Uni for a free vibrator which she quickly latched onto before upgrading to the Satisfyer Pro. Eden now has “a beautiful collection, which has never come in handy more than now following a long term break up”. For others, like Rebecca, Layla, and Harriet, they were prompted just like me by the Satisfyer Pro 2 craze. Harriet “discovered the world of masturbation through this purchase alone”, and has “bought many more since”.
Purchasing sex toys can be a WHOLE range of feelings: excitement, shame, fear, happiness, guilt. And it’s no wonder - masturbation for women can be seen as an extremely taboo topic. Eden was “really excited” but also “a bit embarrassed depending on who I was talking to”, as while she is a “pretty open book sexually”, she knew that really wasn’t the case for many others. Rebecca felt a “bit more comfortable” seeing as the purchase was done online but “still it felt like I was doing something wrong”. She describes how she “sat outside for days waiting for it to arrive in case the package wasn’t discreet”. Layla was on a similar boat, saying she was “glad it came in discreet packaging so my flatties didn’t see what it was”. Harriet “felt taboo but only from internalised shame about it”, but also found that “it was exciting because it was taboo”.
For these ladies, owning a vibrator means different but equally amazing things for each of them. Eden feels that owning a vibrator means “independence, knowledge, and understanding”, as well as “mutual pleasure, and that my break up sucks two per cent less”. In Rebecca’s case it means “I can get off whenever the hell I want without having to rely on a bloody man”, discussing how the process also helps reduce her stress and anxiety. Layla’s perception is also about controlling “how you want to be pleasured”, and Harriet has noticed that owning one has made her “more open to talking to my friends about it”, showing that more meaningful conversations around sex for women are FINALLY being opened up and normalised on a more regular basis.
Alongside talking to these women, I also got the chance to talk to Kate Spencer from Wellington. Kate is an avid sex toy user, an affiliate with Adulttoymegastore, and a poet who writes poetry about her sex life and sexuality. When I approached her about the rise of vibrators, she quoted “I’m fucking ecstatic!!! I’ve been a fan for my whole adult life and have tried to normalise talking about sex, sex toys and sexuality.” Kate is a huge inspiration for opening up conversations about female pleasure, with her first solo comedy show called ‘Squirt’ about her “being an overtly sexual, sexy woman who squirts. I am unashamed by how much I love sex.” She is also currently working on a sequel: ‘Squirt 2: Cum Again?’
The fact that vibrators and other sex toys for female pleasure are finally becoming mainstream is a BIG deal for women everywhere, myself included. For centuries, women’s bodies and female pleasure has been looked down on as an icky subject not worth discussing. FUCK THAT. We deserve ALL the orgasms and sexual gratification that our body can physically handle. It’s more than just sex: it’s independence, pleasure, knowledge, open conversations with your friends, control, normalisation, getting rid of the internalised shame about our bodies and our sexual urges. As Kate said, “Thank fuck that female pleasure is being taken more seriously. For too long, female sexuality and desire has been ignored by the patriarchy. Fuck yeah for us fighting back!”
For a 10% off discount at Adulttoymegastore, you can use Kate’s discount code (KATE10) at checkout. She also recommends the store ‘Clean Satisfaction’ for ceramic dildos (‘low waste sex toys, yes please!’) You can also visit her website (www.creatifkate.com) to keep up with her incredible endeavours.