Ramming w/ Fergus: Licking toes

Q. Hey Fergie, I want to be a better girlfriend. She's really into licking... toes? fingers? Don't even know, man. Any tips? 

A. I’ve never been in a committed relationship so it’s hard for me to say how you can be a better girlfriend. But what I do know lots about is kinks – and a feet kink is nothing I haven’t seen before.  

I suspect your girlfriend must be a farrier, because all farriers have feet kinks. Every farrier I’ve ever met has seemed all too into my hooves. They always nuzzle my leg in between their thighs, caressing my hooves before they trim my tootsies. I admit, I do have rather nice hooves. All the sex means I never get laminitis.  

So, your girlfriend wants to take her farrier work into the bedroom. I’m surprised she doesn't want to have more work life balance but to each their own.  

My motto is EMBRACE THE KINK! Never judge someone's kink.

Pretend you are a sheep, horse, cow (or me) and let her lick your feet. It will make it more realistic for her work in the field. Make sure you snap your leg back a couple of times like most of the sheep do. You’ll make a good tease. She can even keep on her chaps and apron for extra dirtiness.