“Tiny”, “Small Wonder”, “Free Ride”: low or no alcohol beer degrading names

Low and non-alcohol beers have been growing in popularity for many years now, but some brands seem to insinuate a not-so-subtle stigma that they’re for wimps.  

These days, all major brewing companies offer at least one less potent beverage, ranging from 2.5% ABV to less than 0.5%. 

Major companies like Speights, Heineken, and Export called their non-alcoholic range simply: “Export Gold 0.0%” or "Speights Summit Zero”. However, craft breweries tend to get a bit more creative. 

Garage Project, one of the largest in the craft space, called their 2.2% ale the “Fugazi”. This sounds quite exotic, but a quick google search reveals a translation of “something that is fake or damaged beyond repair”. Interesting. 

Their non-alcoholic IPA is more forward: the “Tiny”.  

At risk of sounding like a year-10 English teacher, you could point out these names appear to imply low or no alcohol beers are fake - not a real beer - or miniature versions of their high percentage cousins. 

Zed Woodman, duty manager at a bar on Wellington’s Courtenay Place, said while no one seemed to mind ordering low or no alcoholic beers, he occasionally saw people hide that they are having other non-alcoholic beverages from their friends. 

“Sometimes if there's a group of people drinking, one of them will come up separately and ask for a soda water and ask me to make it look like a vodka soda or not to tell people it's non-alcoholic.” 

Woodman also called some of the low alcohol craft beer names “degrading” and said it could come across as “you're not as blokey” by drinking them. 

Good George Brewing’s “Small Wonder Pale Ale” is unsurprisingly 2.5%, while their non-alcoholic IPA is called the “Virtual Reality”, assumedly a mere simulation of the real deal. 

The “Lowrider” from Croucher Brewing is pretty reasonable, except for the words “A VERY SMALL IPA” printed on the can. 

Mac’s offers two non-alcoholic beers: the “Stunt Double”, because you’re not pulling any stunts drinking less than 0.5% ABV, and the “Free Ride”, so you can sober drive your stunt-pulling friends home. 

The Behemoth Brewing company tops things off with their “Responsibly Non-Alcoholic Hazy IPA”, which you can purchase as part of their “Hangover Free Fun Pack”. 

Woodman said the companies probably don’t intend to be degrading.  

“In the name, one of their tasks is probably letting everyone know that it is a low alcohol beer - just from the name.” 

“To them, low alcohol reflects small things, fake things, something trying to be something else, which yes, is true, but is maybe something we should stop doing.” 

Massey design student Mack Eggers is one student who occasionally drinks low alcohol beers if he’s driving somewhere afterwards. 

While he hadn’t really been in a situation where there's been any stigma around drinking low alcohol beers, he felt there was a particular theme around some craft beer names. 

“They’re kind of portraying it like a secondary beer, a not as good beer.” 

“It’s kind of putting the idea out there that it’s “tiny”, like a fake beer, possibly.” 

Eggers pointed out it is just craft breweries doing this, who he noted tend to have more interesting names overall than their mainstream counterparts. 

He said he wouldn’t have a problem ordering a “Tiny” or similarly named beer at a bar. 

“I'd feel ok, the people around me wouldn't take the mick out of me. It’s kind of giving off the fact it’s not a real beer, not a manly beer, but I’d be pretty fine with having one of those.” 

A report released in January 2022 by the Brewers Association of New Zealand said low alcoholic beer sales had rocketed 1116% over five years.  

Considering the numbers, it’s safe to say the Small Wonders of the alcoholic world are here to stay - regardless of any year-10 English teacher analysis.