Crazy, Stupid Crocs: The Unlikely Triumph of the World’s Ugliest Shoe

From a downtrodden write-off on the brink of despair to an unlikely hero showered with respect and adoration - the Crocs story is a triumph of rom-com proportions. Crocs are objectively cool now. It feels weird to say, but that doesn’t make it any less true. A combination of celebrity endorsements, sheer stubbornness, and a little bit of luck has allowed Crocs to carve themselves a glorious little niché within the shoe-biz, and defy all odds in going from one of the world’s most hated to most beloved shoe brands.    

Next year, Crocs will celebrate their twentieth anniversary. While that makes them a relatively young brand in the wider context of the shoe industry, they’ve been around long enough now to assert themselves as a shoe with staying power. In their early years, what perhaps kept Crocs in business was their refusal to let global ridicule derail their self-belief. They quickly realised that despite the supreme ugliness of their shoes, there was an exceptional practicality to them that was unfuckwithable. Comfortable, durable, wipe-downable, non-slip, aerated; the handy strap even spoilt customers with the choice of a sports or leisure mode to suit their unpredictable lifestyles. There was clearly a lot to love. Soon after their launch in 2002, Crocs became a staple for nurses, chefs, boaters, dads, rock pool enthusiasts and anyone who spends all day on their feet. However, their burgeoning popularity in these sectors, coupled with their blatant refusal to please the fashionistas, meant that a growing disdain for Crocs began to emerge alongside their success. 

This attitude would take root. By 2010, Time Magazine had voted Crocs among the ‘top 50 worst inventions’ of all time, and a Facebook page titled ‘I don’t care how comfortable Crocs are, you look like a dumbass’ had gathered 1.2 million fans. The ferocity of the ‘Croc-shamers’ as they came to be known, had begun to take a toll on the company’s bottom line. Crocs came within an inch of bankruptcy in 2008, and spent the next decade barely keeping their head above water. In 2017, their sales had slumped again and the future looked bleak. If the Crocs story was actually the script of Crazy, Stupid, Love, then this would be the moment that Steve Carrell jumps out of a moving car after Julianne Moore tells him she slept with David Linghagen (Kevin Bacon). Crocs had hit croc-bottom. But their fortunes were all about to change. Ryan Gosling was waiting just around the corner with a brand-new look and some timely advice on how to convince the cool kids that you’re worth a damn.     

In 2017, high fashion brand Balenciaga first revealed its platform Crocs during Paris Fashion Week. Unsurprisingly, the internet lost the plot. The memes came in thick and fast. “Just when you think 2017 couldn’t get any worse, Balenciaga invent the platform croc. The world weeps,” read one, “I just fucked your bitch in my Balenciaga crocs” read another. But these bad boys did more than just polarise the internet, they put Crocs back on the map in a way that nobody could have seen coming.     

In February 2018, the Balenciaga platform Crocs rolled out for sale at the eye-boggling price of $850 USD per pair. They sold out before they’d even hit the stores. From there, momentum snowballed. Companies and celebrities alike all flocked to the Croc. Post Malone, Justin Bieber, Bad Bunny, Ruby Rose, and KISS are just a few examples of celebrities who have rocked out with their Crocs out, all producing collabs that sold out in minutes. Even KFC jumped on board, creating a fried chicken scented Croc. While ‘toe-sniffin’ good’ doesn’t really get me going in the same way, my prudish proclivities were not shared by the general public. The KFC Crocs were gobbled up faster than you can say foot fetish.   

In regards to the collab frenzy, Crocs’ Director Molly Wilhelm had this to say: “We focus on partnering with a wide range of collaborators - from luxury fashion and country musicians to streetwear mavericks and cultural icons...” If you’re reading this, Ms. Wilhelm, I would like to throw out there a cultural icon for your consideration: Albany’s Chicken Wing Statue. We’d love to see it. If you could make it lube scented then all the better.   

Another piece of marketing genius that is also to thank (or blame) for Crocs’ ascension into pop culture fanfare are Jibbitz. These little charms pop right into your croc-holes to tell the world that the SKUX of the party just walked in. In the words of Crocs themselves, Jibbitz are “fun, symbolic and sentimental charms to represent your unique self to the world on your favourite pair of Croc shoes”. Crocs were no longer solely the pragmatists’ shoe. They were hurling shit at fashion’s door and it was sticking like hot glue.     

The role that Covid-19 has had on Croc’s recent successes can also not be overstated. With billions of people around the world stuck at home, and comfy becoming the new norm, more and more people have turned to the Croc to satisfy their footwear needs. Since the pandemic, the Crocs share price has risen a whopping 700%. If you’d had the foresight to invest your course-related costs on Crocs shares last year, you would now have the money to become the proud owner of 228 pairs of the classic clog. That’s 227 more pairs than you’ll ever need though, because these suckers are just that dang durable. Whether or not they can sustain their tenure at such dizzying heights still remains to be seen but, if you ask me, there’s a strong chance we’re still only witnessing the beginning.    

You may have noticed Crocs slowly appearing on the feet of students around the Massey campus. Tan France of Queer Eye famously called Crocs the “giving-up-on-life shoes” which makes them the perfect fit for Massey students, most of whom are past that point anyway. If you’re feeling inspired to fork out the $69.99 required to join the Croc club, be aware that you might encounter a smattering of anti-Croc sentiment that lingers around campus like old milk. I tell you this not to dissuade you from making the purchase, but rather to inform you that these clingers-on are a dying breed. I promise you that you will have the last laugh as you and your Crocs walk the road of style and comfort.   

If there is a lesson to be learned amongst all of this, then that is to never write off the underdog. You may be shocked to hear that I too was a Croc-shamer, once upon a time. All we can hope for is that by learning from the mistakes of our past, we might one day wake up and find some beauty in the ugliness of it all.