Farmgirl Fitcheck
City girls guide to hot farmer fashion
Muddy gumboots, unmanicured nails, worn-out overalls, sweat-stained armpits, dirty and downright unstylish are only some of harmful misconceptions farmers face daily.
The serious allegations that farmers can’t look good on the job are getting out of hand. So, I–a fashionable city gal who is level 401 on Hay Day and an avid Minecraft player–decided to prove to all the haters that farmers can be cute. Whether that’s out in the fields... or at the local hoedown... or on their horse named Yankee Doodle.
It was early Saturday morning when I set out with my chauffeur (my mum), my fashion-forward harvest partner (bestie), and my personal farmhand (photographer). As we headed over the hills to brave the rural lands of the Wairarapa, my farmer alter ego began taking control.
Sweep your eyes overall me
If you want to be known as the absolute baddie who’s constantly serving in the sheep shed, blue overalls from Farmsource, paired with your favourite Red Band gumboots is the perfect outfit. The overall’s cheeky V-neckline will show off your beautiful farming cleavage or chest hair. It will be sure to bring all the farming boys or gals to the yard.
Kim Farmdashian
The Farm Source store manager recommended a purple wet-weather set, and I can see why because god damn! We looked sexy as fuck. The midrise pants give you a perfect bubble butt, while the jacket really snatches that waist in.
Hoedown Hottie
If you’re into the whole sexy park ranger look, look no further than a fur lined vest paired with a classic wide brimmed hat. Perfect for showing off your huge farmer biceps on a crisp autumn day. You could also wear this when you pull up to the local hoedown on your horse Seabiscuit, it’s an incredibly versatile outfit.
Stunning in Stubbies
For all my farmers out there who love to serve with their good ol’ classic stubbies and gummies, PGG Wrightson’s is the perfect place to spend your next retail therapy trip. Take your pick from their vast colour range of stubbies (preferably hot pink) matched with any Swanndri jacket. Show off those glutes, farmers. I sure showed mine off in my stubbies, and boy oh boy. Everyone was jealous of how good I looked. Top this outfit off with a straw hat and your best pair of gumboots, and you’re ready for an evening tractor ride around Old MacDonald’s farm.
Harvesting Heartthrobs
I was thoroughly disappointed about the lack of pitchforks in the previous two stores. However, after stepping into Farmlands I was filled with joy. Pitchforks are a go-to accessory for any hot farm fit – and we have pictures to prove it.
Whether it’s summer or winter, Farmlands has you covered with their range of seasonal pink overalls. Layer them with a plaid shirt tied around your waist or under your overalls, and you’ll have had a seed planted in your field in no time. My harvest partner and I were fighting off a herd of men lusting after us when modelling these outfits. Luckily, we had our trusty pitchforks to ward them off.
___________________
As we left the rural lands of the Wairarapa, I felt exhausted. It’s tough proving that farmers don’t have terrible style. But after today, they’ll no longer have to live under the harmful misconception that they aren’t fashion baddies.
Farmers – go ride your horses, dig some holes, watch the sunset in a field of wheat, and build some fences in fashion.